the first "official" bath

Ok Ok---> so it may seem a little obsessive, but have to share this. So my son had his first official bath on January 7, 2010. I find it somewhat strange that his doctor said to wait until his umbilical cord fell out before we bathed him, but it is what it is right. At least it didnt take 3 weeks for the damn thing to drop off. lol

He was so hesitant at first, then again when it was time to get out. WAY to cold for the little guy. However, believe it or not he actually loves to bath now. Alright well until next time.

Bringing in the New Year

My New Year festivities were nearly none existant.... Well the festivities involving the large group of friends or family.... the cazoos, streamers, champagne and the countdown. Matter of factly I wasnt even awake to bring it in. Instead I was fast asleep next to my 2 favorite boys.. Jamus and Walker Lee. I dont have many followers, but for those of you who have read my prior post I now have a son. He came into our lives on December 30, 2009 at 4:42 am. He weighed in at 8lbs 2.1 ounces and was 2o inches long. He had a head full of hair, blue eyes and the most adoring set of dimples. (Thanks all in part to his dad). He is perfect in every way. He had us wait an extra 10 days (technically 7, but like they say doctors are quacks) but he was worth every second of the wait. Tuesday morning, December 29, 2009 Jamus and I drove into Seattle to begin the induction process...... And minus a few personal details the rest is history.

Being a mother is the most amazing thing I have ever done. I cant honestly say I doubt that anything will ever top that. I now feel as though I know exactly what I was meant to do in life. I now know exactly who I was meant to be. Or I at least have a much more clear picture of the way my life is supposed to unfold. My son is everything. He is everything I am.. Everything I am not... And anything he ever wants to be. My thoughts about him are so much more then over-welming , I feel as though words can only scratch the surface.

Well, I have decided that I wil definetly write more often now... and post as many photos as I can.. So.. for the followers... I have now figured out what my focus is and will forever be..

ciao

new news

well once again I have neglected my duties as a blogger... So I suppose I will give an update of a few current life events...

My best friends wedding.... August 14, 2009 ---> In a word.... Amazing! Not only the physical part of the wedding, but all of the sentiment involved. In my mind it was one of the greatest things to partake in. Lacy Lee Slick now known as Lacy Lee Patton.... known to only me as "lilu" one of my dearest. Firsts.... so many... Life lessons---> so many more. To see someone that you have a kinship with become satisfied and happy in life is probably one of the greatest gifts that "life" can give you. All she ever wanted was to be a mother and wife. Those were her 2 biggest dreams coming from an area where people dream bigger then the universe itself. To see your friends and family become happy in life is one of the greatest things.....

Speaking of great things in life... Jamus and I are expecting a child. A little boy. He supposed to make his debut in December. I cant wait to meet him. Honestly I cant even begin to describe what it is to be apart of this life thats coming. I know that women have been doing this for years and most of them have nothing but amazing things to say about carrying a child, but for e I truly feel like it is the most granduis thing I've ever done. I don't know what will happen once he's here. I question myself with him not being safe inside my belly. lol --> I know it may sound ridiculous. To feel him move is indescribable. I'm just coming into my 6th month and feel amazing. Granted I feel large, but I suppose thats just a side affect. I have been fortunate enough to not have been sick at all and my appetite is exceptional. Food has a whole new flavor. It was good before, but now its so much better then good.

The living situation: Putting the house back on the market. Cross your fingers for us. The market has gotten so bad that now I'm in a fearful position of owing more then its worth. So we'll see what happens.... Like I said cross your fingers for me.

Well, I'm sure I'm missing a lot of "up datable" information since the last blog, but I suppose for now this will have to do.

working on it....

Well dont I feel like a part of the connected world?

Created a facebook account thanks to my also "new worldy" connected friend Mr. Jamus lee. Figured he'd get a kick out of that. So then I find myself curious about my blog. A blog that I've neglected for quite sometime. Just about the same amount of time I neglected myspace. So why you ask...? Why would I fail to maintain my current internet connections, but increase the amount of connections I have....?? Its like adding more to a pot thats already boiling over..... I have no Idea. Maybe just trying to make myself feel alittle bit more connected the the world that is so much bigger then myself.Elementary my dear Watson.... Simple, basic, boredom..... Entertainment if you will.

Since I dont really believe that many people have seen this or that many people even know that this blog exist I feel that writing it it is somewhat personal. I suppose..... Either way I felt compelled to write today about nothing more then nonsense it self. As an update.. Im still doing my "soul-searching" conquest. I truely beleive that this will forever and a day be then story of my life. I will continue to pursue my own identity. As of recent I have found myself wondering what my life woudl be like if I were to travel.... I honestly think I could survive for a month tops on my credit cards and savings. However, I would be stupid to think that I could ever actually up root myself with as much shit as I have going on at this moment. I feel like I have too much on my plate. Or maybe its just that my stomach is full. Its alright tho I guess. Maybe my adventures are supposed to be delayed in life. Maybe I wasnt meant to be worldly... Or maybe I was just not at this moment. Its a nice thought tho. Eventually..... If its in my cards. I suppose my yearning for something greater then what I currently possess is my justification if you will for staying connected. Being on-line. Talking outlound on internet pages in the center of world wide web space. Non-sense really if you think about it. Unnecessary non-sense that seems to fufill a momentary need for benign adventure. I guess if you read this and for some reason I seem ungrateful Im not. I am truly thankful for the things I have, people I know and the person I am. I just wonder sometimes who I'd be or whom I'd know if I had taken another path. Or what if I changed my path... I'm curious about the people I might know or the person I may become. Again I emphasize that fact that I'm on a journey of soul-searching. So if you are reading these words and feel like I have gone in a complete circle of explaination or
justification---> I have. I feel the same.I do know that I am not alone tho. I do know that just 10 seconds ago a thousand people if not more said or thought soem of the same thoughts I just wrote. Matter of fact.... in the next 30 seconds another thousand will do it all over again. So in all my sanity I feel better... Or I at least feel like I'm apart of something bigger then myself. An idea bigger then myself. A theory or philosophy that I might be apart of.
Anyways, I'll close with that.... a bunch of uneditted non-sense.
Enjoy.

Today...

Today is the day of my birth.... 24 years ago...

Sorry to some and thanks for celebrating to others.

Today I've decided to not stress... Not stress about the sale of my house... Or the NOT sale of my house.... Not stress about the relationships I attempt to have.... Not stress about the 75K those rotten sunsabitches want from me. Honestly, I'm going to make an extra effort in NOT stressing about the fact that I'm at work.....

I spoke with my mother last night on what she calls my "birthday eve" and it was refreshing. I vented for 45 minutes about all of the things I'm Not going to stress or think about today and her response was one of brilliance----> she laughed.... For a moment I thought she was laughing at me... Which I couldn't blame her for anyways, but she wasn't. She wasn't laughing at me... She was in essence laughing with me..... (except at this point in the conversation I was not at all amused). However, she said to me something that I needed to hear... She said she laughs, because for her entire 53 years the "samethings" seem to happen to her.... Every year.. Never failing.. So she tells me I should start laughing about it now, so by the time I'm her age it wont bother me that much... Brilliant I think. Absolutely brilliant....So I suppose that I will..Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil.... FOR today anyway.

And for now I will end on that note. Happy Birthday to me. Greatest gift I've recieved..... The ideal of "how to deal". Love you mom.

my blogging adventure begins.....

Well today is the first day...

Ive been inspired to blog, by one of my dearest friends... dani leanne. I haven't really thought about what direction my blogging will go..... At this particular juncture in time I am missing my dearest dani. Maybe that is why have felt so compelled to do this. Right now I just think I'm ready for a change... Something more permanent than changing my house around or chopping off all my hair... I feel like I've started the oh-so-interesting journey of soul-searching.

So many things having been happening in my life.... I am currently contemplating many things. Beginning with the sale of my home and my life here in Washington. Part of me has been desire a different life... A different location. I have contemplated Australia, with one of my other dearest, miss astrid. God knows that would be an adventure of a lifetime..... I have been thinking about a visit to Jamaica to see my dani leanne..... And many a times I have thought of going for a sabbatical on the Big Island with myshell..... Michaela originated that thought, but do to her recent venture back home it is just michelle with the manarays. Unfortunately my true nature is not so spontaneous... I condemn the fact that I am so much more practical then that... Then to pick up and go, without a care in the world. Without the thought of what I might miss out on once I'm gone. In my true nature I'm so absorbed with the "practical" things in my life, that I feel like I will never know the real "value" in not caring.... Not caring about the mortgage, the bills, the credit that I have established.... The "value" in those things that seemed so important to me at one time now have no real value at all. Most people my age don't seem to have this care.... I must confess that I am envious of that.... I have wrapped myself up so securely that it has become an issue for anyone to undo.

Honestly, I have to get back at the job... You know... the pure reason for my existence... lol But I promise that I will attempt to come up with something profound to write about next time. So for now, I suppose this was a good start.... Maybe just a sample of whats to come.